Drum roll please...... I got an interview! I applied for a series of jobs and a radio station called me back so here's to hoping this works out in my favor. I will be SO stoked. Having a place to go everyday out in the work force again. Man that sounds so great, right? While I love watching my DVR everyday, I have to say I'd much rather have a career. So this is short, the interview is tomorrow and without over-thinking it, I still need to prepare. I hope someone reads this and wishes me luck. Throw all your positive vibes at me. It would be greatly appreciated.
So for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, that's a bit of my story and thanks for making it to this point. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Wanna know something that wasn't clear in my story FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO. ;-)
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Um...where was I? ;)
So, with the last few posts being... less than joyful here's a nice even tempered entry. The stuff with my friends still sucks, but what I've done to myself about it is only making it worse. With that said, I'm over it. LOL, getting over it. I can't change 25 years of me overnight, but I feel fine now. Applied for some jobs and went to this SUPER COOL networking shindig this past Friday. I wasn't planning on a particularly good time, but it was really fun and somewhat helpful. Speed-networking. I was so scared that I almost didn't do it, but then I said, "why the hell did you come here?" Then I realized I just came to get out of the house and never planned on really participating. So then I said, "...well do it anyway." It was great and soooo easy. People responded to me positively and it just reminded me of something. I'm smart, personable, have something to say and have unique work experience.
It seems like I've just forgotten that. I don't like that I have. There is always something that a person does well... I don't care if you blow out candles with your butt, if you do it well embrace it. So I enjoyed myself and between "Bummed" and "Downer" I left that out. Here's to hoping there is nothing, but joy for the foreseeable future.
So for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, that's a bit of my story and thanks for making it to this point. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Wanna know something that wasn't clear in my story FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO. ;-)
It seems like I've just forgotten that. I don't like that I have. There is always something that a person does well... I don't care if you blow out candles with your butt, if you do it well embrace it. So I enjoyed myself and between "Bummed" and "Downer" I left that out. Here's to hoping there is nothing, but joy for the foreseeable future.
So for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, that's a bit of my story and thanks for making it to this point. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Wanna know something that wasn't clear in my story FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO. ;-)
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Downer...
So... I found out yesterday that a friend of a friend... prefers to avoid my company. It seems I am a downer. That I never want to do anything. Well, since my illness, clubbing and going out has moved down my list of things that I enjoy. I'm, of late, trying to change that. I felt and sometimes still feel uncomfortable, awkward, in those types of situations. I've gained a considerable amount of weight and am self conscious about that as well. And my overall outlook on life has changed as well. The way I phrase things can be a little off putting so people who don't know me may get the wrong impression of me.
It's when I realize that my best friends feel the same way that I'm hurt. They love me regardless, but still understand the strangers outlook and that bothers me. I do the best I can at each moment in my life. Maybe my harsh stance on most things is a defense mechanism, maybe not. The not wanting to do anything though... that's totally real. I love my friends and i want to spend time with them as well,but at the same time hanging out as lost some of its luster for me.
I feel as though I'm suppose to apologize for the way I am now. I feel as though I am suppose to be the same me that I was before October 31, 2006 when that girl died. She died everyday she couldn't talk, breathe on her own, or had to drag herself to and fro and be hoisted onto a toilet. She died every time she was hoisted too late and had to be wiped like a child. I don't think even I understood how much that has affected me. If I'm just coming to that realization, how could my friends possibly understand. Butt even when they say they get it... I still feel like I'm suppose to apologize. As though I've done something wrong.
Maybe that's my own guilt, because I too miss the girl I use to be. The girl who thought the world was her oyster. That 22 year old girl... she was awesome, she was funny, she was friendly. This girl? Well, apparently she's a downer. Any positive thing I've said still stands. This is just been a crappy few days.
So for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, that's a bit of my story and thanks for making it to this point. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Wanna know something that wasn't clear in my story FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO. ;-)
It's when I realize that my best friends feel the same way that I'm hurt. They love me regardless, but still understand the strangers outlook and that bothers me. I do the best I can at each moment in my life. Maybe my harsh stance on most things is a defense mechanism, maybe not. The not wanting to do anything though... that's totally real. I love my friends and i want to spend time with them as well,but at the same time hanging out as lost some of its luster for me.
I feel as though I'm suppose to apologize for the way I am now. I feel as though I am suppose to be the same me that I was before October 31, 2006 when that girl died. She died everyday she couldn't talk, breathe on her own, or had to drag herself to and fro and be hoisted onto a toilet. She died every time she was hoisted too late and had to be wiped like a child. I don't think even I understood how much that has affected me. If I'm just coming to that realization, how could my friends possibly understand. Butt even when they say they get it... I still feel like I'm suppose to apologize. As though I've done something wrong.
Maybe that's my own guilt, because I too miss the girl I use to be. The girl who thought the world was her oyster. That 22 year old girl... she was awesome, she was funny, she was friendly. This girl? Well, apparently she's a downer. Any positive thing I've said still stands. This is just been a crappy few days.
So for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, that's a bit of my story and thanks for making it to this point. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Wanna know something that wasn't clear in my story FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO. ;-)
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Bummed...
So, I'm kinda bummed out. Just spoke to a friend of mine. One of my very best friends. He seems to think that I should do something that's incredibly easy for him, but not so much for me. He thinks that the only way I can get the job I want is to move and get a non-paid internship somewhere. Now... that is not crazy talk, but he's forgetting that something like that is not as easy for me as it is for him. I put on a brave face. I'm pretty damn awesome if I do say so myself, but at the very same time I'm kinda fragile. I want so much, but my disability makes it difficult for me to do a lot of things I would love to do to get the many things that I want.
My good friend just got a job out in L.A. He, by the way, gets pretty much every major thing he wants and he has no trouble getting rid of all of his worldly possessions. He's a fighter, but also a lucky S.O.B. :). I wish I was like him... then again, I wish i could feel my toes. We don't always get what we want. As much as I want to take giant leaps of faith, I think it will be a complete tragedy if I fail. So it kinda sucks when someone implies I'm not doing everything I could. Because like I've said, applying for jobs... is my job. So yeah, I'm bummed and I don't know if that's because, he's right or not.
So... for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, thanks for reading. if your're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Have any questions? FEEL FREE TO ASK... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M HANDICAPPED AND UNEMPLOYED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO ;-)
~Chronically Unemployed
My good friend just got a job out in L.A. He, by the way, gets pretty much every major thing he wants and he has no trouble getting rid of all of his worldly possessions. He's a fighter, but also a lucky S.O.B. :). I wish I was like him... then again, I wish i could feel my toes. We don't always get what we want. As much as I want to take giant leaps of faith, I think it will be a complete tragedy if I fail. So it kinda sucks when someone implies I'm not doing everything I could. Because like I've said, applying for jobs... is my job. So yeah, I'm bummed and I don't know if that's because, he's right or not.
So... for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, thanks for reading. if your're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Have any questions? FEEL FREE TO ASK... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M HANDICAPPED AND UNEMPLOYED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO ;-)
~Chronically Unemployed
Waking Up At Noon... Again
Noon thirty-five to be exact. Ah the life of the unemployed, right? Not really. I personally would prefer getting up and heading in to my salaried job at an advertising, or talent agency, but this is what I have. Gotta embrace it right? No? Anyway, as I did yesterday and the day before and the day before and the day before (honestly), I fix myself a little something to eat, play around with Meow a little (my Tabby), open up my laptop and get to work with the applying.
I have applied for jobs and applied for jobs. Seriously everyday... My job is applying for jobs and maintaining my DVR of course. With my degree in Communications I should be doing something more. My handicap though doesn't make that easily. Can't stand long, or sit too long for that matter, but I want to work more than anything, but it's hard, but I want it, but I don't know if I can, but I want to. You get what I'm saying? Well for the most part I try to put on a brave face and make lemonade with the lemons I've been given. And though it took me a while to get to this point. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade! Cliche? Hell yeah, but otherwise you'll be miserable.
My life is NO picnic, beyond the handicap and unemployment, but if I spent everyday embracing that, I'd miss out every piece of joy in my life. So you, guy or gal, reading this post chin up what you have is what you have and nothing more. It's what you do with what you have that makes life interesting. With all of that don't think I'm all zen LOL. I have my petty moments, I get down, I cry and all that, but I spend my time being happy more than anything.
So... for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, thanks for reading. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Have any questions, FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO ;-)
~Chronically Unemployed
I have applied for jobs and applied for jobs. Seriously everyday... My job is applying for jobs and maintaining my DVR of course. With my degree in Communications I should be doing something more. My handicap though doesn't make that easily. Can't stand long, or sit too long for that matter, but I want to work more than anything, but it's hard, but I want it, but I don't know if I can, but I want to. You get what I'm saying? Well for the most part I try to put on a brave face and make lemonade with the lemons I've been given. And though it took me a while to get to this point. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade! Cliche? Hell yeah, but otherwise you'll be miserable.
My life is NO picnic, beyond the handicap and unemployment, but if I spent everyday embracing that, I'd miss out every piece of joy in my life. So you, guy or gal, reading this post chin up what you have is what you have and nothing more. It's what you do with what you have that makes life interesting. With all of that don't think I'm all zen LOL. I have my petty moments, I get down, I cry and all that, but I spend my time being happy more than anything.
So... for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, thanks for reading. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Have any questions, FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO ;-)
~Chronically Unemployed
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Introducing...me
Hiya! Chronically Unemployed here and I'm... well a lot of things, but for now I'll just introduce myself by telling you the story of how I became both unemployed and handicapped. It was the fall of 2006 (isn't that how all great stories start off?) and I had recently graduated from the University of Michigan. I was young, smart and having a great time. Great boyfriend, awesome friends, partying and overall living it up. Didn't have a job though, but I'd just graduated...that doesn't count...right?
So anywho, my boyfriend had just shipped out to the Air Force, ON MY BIRTHDAY, and I was bummed, but it wasn't the end of the world. But then I caught a cold and it was a stinker too... two weeks after that, I woke up one morning and had the damnedest time getting out of bed. Literally, I could not get out of bed. Everything hurt and I couldn't support my body weight... a problem I hadn't experienced the before the previous night when I visited my sister. I just thought that pesky cold was getting the better of me... it wasn't.
So after debating going to the doctor, crawling around the house and self diagnosing myself with tons of illnesses including, but not limited to, kidney disease my aunt took my mom and I to the hospital where my mother had to practically carry me in. Next thing I know, I wake up delirious a couple days later in the I.C.U. with a tube down my throat and paralyzed from the chest down.
From there... long recovery. Spent three months in the hospital. Oh speaking of that, that great guy I was dating, he wrote me and we talked on the telephone (after they took the trache out) and he came back to town on leave or whatever. Was in town at least a week and I saw him oh I think NEVER. So the last time I spoke to that creep was Valentines day 07'... he professed his love for me and blah blah blah. Eventually spoke to him again... I made him admit to me that he was cheating on me the whole time we were together anyway.
But I digress. Where was I? Long recovery? Yeah, long recovery and I'll tell you. I'd be nothing if it weren't first for my mom and sister and second my friends who didn't let my stay forever hidden in the house since I refused to be seen in public in a wheelchair. I'm getting teary all over again thinking about that time in my life and how grateful I am for the people I love being in my life.
After a while I felt the need to work again, I was no longer in a wheelchair and I craved a little normalcy so I started job hunting again and after no after no after no (which you'll read more about later) I lucked up on a fantastic job. After a year I lost it and then after maybe another 8 months I got it back! Long story that... In that 8 months though I was... you guessed it. Unemployed. And again after 2 years with that fabulous company as of October 2009.
So that's the unemployed and the handicapped. I'm in good shape compared to where I was. I have to wear these hideous ankle braces that muck up everything I wear, but as long as there's no heavy walking or standing I get around... better than the doctors who wrote me off thought I would and that's saying something considering the fact that they thought I was first not going to wake up, then gonna be brain damaged and let's not forget the doc that pretty much told me not to count on my walking again.
So for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, that's a bit of my story and thanks for making it to this point. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Wanna know something that wasn't clear in my story FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO. ;-)
~Chronically Unemployed
So anywho, my boyfriend had just shipped out to the Air Force, ON MY BIRTHDAY, and I was bummed, but it wasn't the end of the world. But then I caught a cold and it was a stinker too... two weeks after that, I woke up one morning and had the damnedest time getting out of bed. Literally, I could not get out of bed. Everything hurt and I couldn't support my body weight... a problem I hadn't experienced the before the previous night when I visited my sister. I just thought that pesky cold was getting the better of me... it wasn't.
So after debating going to the doctor, crawling around the house and self diagnosing myself with tons of illnesses including, but not limited to, kidney disease my aunt took my mom and I to the hospital where my mother had to practically carry me in. Next thing I know, I wake up delirious a couple days later in the I.C.U. with a tube down my throat and paralyzed from the chest down.
From there... long recovery. Spent three months in the hospital. Oh speaking of that, that great guy I was dating, he wrote me and we talked on the telephone (after they took the trache out) and he came back to town on leave or whatever. Was in town at least a week and I saw him oh I think NEVER. So the last time I spoke to that creep was Valentines day 07'... he professed his love for me and blah blah blah. Eventually spoke to him again... I made him admit to me that he was cheating on me the whole time we were together anyway.
But I digress. Where was I? Long recovery? Yeah, long recovery and I'll tell you. I'd be nothing if it weren't first for my mom and sister and second my friends who didn't let my stay forever hidden in the house since I refused to be seen in public in a wheelchair. I'm getting teary all over again thinking about that time in my life and how grateful I am for the people I love being in my life.
After a while I felt the need to work again, I was no longer in a wheelchair and I craved a little normalcy so I started job hunting again and after no after no after no (which you'll read more about later) I lucked up on a fantastic job. After a year I lost it and then after maybe another 8 months I got it back! Long story that... In that 8 months though I was... you guessed it. Unemployed. And again after 2 years with that fabulous company as of October 2009.
So that's the unemployed and the handicapped. I'm in good shape compared to where I was. I have to wear these hideous ankle braces that muck up everything I wear, but as long as there's no heavy walking or standing I get around... better than the doctors who wrote me off thought I would and that's saying something considering the fact that they thought I was first not going to wake up, then gonna be brain damaged and let's not forget the doc that pretty much told me not to count on my walking again.
So for the 1 person who made it to the end of this rant, that's a bit of my story and thanks for making it to this point. If you're interested in the things I've said and may say in the future please subscribe. Wanna know something that wasn't clear in my story FEEL FREE TO ASK ME... WHY? WELL BECAUSE I'M UNEMPLOYED, HANDICAPPED AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO. ;-)
~Chronically Unemployed
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
